


Keep Breathing

by 7point13



Series: lonely nights and lonelier people [3]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, Comfort, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Forgive Me, Friendship, Gen, Happy Ending, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, I Tried, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Sad, Sad with a Happy Ending, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Short, Short & Sweet, Short One Shot, me projecting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-03-01
Packaged: 2019-11-07 18:43:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17965994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/7point13/pseuds/7point13
Summary: Changbin hates the days when all he can seem to do is panic. The days he can't stop shaking. The days he resorts to pain to keep himself breathing. But maybe, when oxygen tastes sour and anxiety gets trapped in his lungs, all he really needs is someone reminding him to keep breathing...





	Keep Breathing

**Author's Note:**

> More of me projecting, what a surprise...   
> Thank you for all of your support on 'Understanding' yall really made my day :)
> 
> As you could probably guess from the tags TRIGGER WARNING!! It's small and not very graphic but this one-shot does involve self-harm and anxiety/panic attacks, though not specific. Take care of yourselves and stay safe humans!! <3

Blunt nails dug down into soft flesh. 

Breath in...

1

2

3

4

Out, 

1

2

3

4

His mantra was repeated over and over until he couldn’t focus. He couldn’t breathe. Why was breathing so hard? He tried desperately to steady his breathing. In, out, in, out, in- Changbin just couldn’t do it. He choked back a sob as rugged nails dug down. Deeper and deeper, until he could see small pools or red forming against pale skin.

Changbin focused on the pain burning through his veins. He blinked back the tears as violent sobs attempted to crawl off his tongue. The warm blood seeping from delicate half-moons dripped down his ankle, mirroring the tears dripping down his face. But none of the registered.

All he could think of was the word. That terrible word.

_ “Attention whore” _

It shouldn’t have hurt him as much as it did. Shouldn’t have cut so deep. But all Changbin could think of was the fucking word. Just one comment from a complete stranger managed to torpedo his whole day.

Changbin tried to remind himself that they didn’t know better. They didn’t know about how many days he had spent wishing he could be invisible. Or better yet, disappear. They couldn’t have known that he found hard to breath whenever he got called on in class. They didn’t know about the pills he was meant to take to spot his brain from panicking. This pills he had run out of…

The walls of his bedroom were closing in. Sadness, self-hate, and anxiety formed an acid in his stomach. Earthquakes seemed to shake his body as words, and screams filled his lungs like smoke. Choking him. Killing him.

But try as he might, Changbin couldn’t utter a word. His tongue was heavy in his mouth like a rock. Sharp teeth bit down on already tortured lips like prison bars. Trapping his cries for help. He couldn’t feel anything but this otherworldly pain. And it was the worst type of pain. Pain that you couldn’t fix with a bandaid or medication. Pain that no one would understand unless they felt it too. Pain that convinced people you were insane.

Pain that convinced you too…

As this pain coursed through his body like a poison, Changbin was jolted from his panic as a pair of headphone slipped over his ears. Before him, was a familiar face, preached on the end of his bed. Gasping for air the brunette tried to articulate the words he needed. Tried to explain to Jisung what the fuck was going on.

“No, hyung, you don’t have to say anything, okay? Just stay right there and try to copy my breath. Okay?”, Jisung smiled kindly, before pressing a button on his phone.

Music began to float through the headphones. Soft notes filled Changbin’s senses. Doing as Jisung asked, the older began to mimic the other. The pressure in his lungs began to releases, finally allowing him to slump down into the younger’s arms. As the warms and comfort of Jisung’s arms. Tired eyes slipped closed as Changbin relaxed, soothed by the familiar rise and fall of Jisung’s chest. A subtle reminder that all he had to do was keep breathing.


End file.
